Monday, October 12, 2009

Technology for dummies... really...

Advice on Using the Spreadsheet Facility: Don't.

Troubleshooting Section: You will have many, many problems with your computer. Here are some common problems and their solutions.
Problem: My computer won't turn on.
Solution: Check to make sure the computer is plugged in; check to make sure the power button in the ON position; check the cables for damage; dig up underground cables in your garden and check for damage; drive out into the country and check electricity pylons for signs of fallen wires; call hotline.
Problem: My keyboard doesn't seem to have any keys.
Solution: Turn the keyboard the right way up.
Problem: My computer is a piece of useless junk.
Correct - and congratulations. You are now ready to upgrade to an Anthrax/3000 Turbo model, or to go back to pen and paper.

Notes from a big country, Bill Bryson

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